London – In a recent turn of events, the share price of Nestle saw an instant rise when former Pakistani Dictator Pervez Musharraf announced that he will buy the company.
Musharraf’s announcement came after he was served Nestle’s Peach nectar for breakfast. Musharraf, who was getting tired of being served Shezan Orange every morning, welcomed the change. He immediately announced that he loves the juice so much that he will buy the company and will stop worrying about being served Shezan again in the morning for his entire life.
Musharraf’s fanclub on Facebook has termed the announcement as another positive step towards a better Pakistan. The spokesperson for the fanclub “Musharraf <3″ spoke to Roznama Jawani and said that this move will probably set fire to asses of Waderas and Jageerdars. The spokesperson, Najla Tabassim said that even though Musharraf plans to buy the company for himself, it will directly affect the Pakistanis.
For now, Musharraf has ordered 1000, 1 litre juice boxes from Nestle. His statement further said that “1000 ought to be enough till I eventually buy the company or get sick and tired of it as well. Only time will tell. But for me, Pakistan comes first. There is corruption everywhere but since I am innocent of all crimes people will be by my side and we will buy Nestle once and for all. I will have that juice by hook or by crook!”.
The CEO of Nestle Mr. Paul Bulcke has welcomed the gesture and has hinted that he would appreciate a “commission” for making this possible.
